By Kelly Pettyjohn

Setting 

A typical living room in a sub­ur­ban house. There is a large window next to  the front door. A sickly house plant is in a pot on the floor next to a couch. 

Time 

Late after­noon. 

Char­ac­ters 

Astral, the DOG
Gigi, the CAT
Mailman 

Act I, Scene I 

(DOG wags his tail, runs to the window and jumps on the windowsill.) 

DOG 

I think it’s him! He’s back! I knew he would come back. 

CAT 

He is not back. That is the neigh­bor. See? He is walking past our house. 

(CAT lan­guid­ly licks her paws while lying on the back of the couch. DOG jumps  down from the windowsill.) 

DOG 

He’ll come back. He always comes back. Doesn’t he? 

CAT 

Well, he always leaves, so I suppose that means he always comes back. 

DOG 

And did he leave today?

(DOG cocks his head while looking at CAT.) 

CAT 

He did leave today. Or was that yes­ter­day? At some point he must have left,  for he is not here now. 

DOG 

He’ll come back soon. I hope he comes back soon, I need to pee.

(DOG jumps back on the windowsill.) 

CAT 

You always need to pee. You drink water, you eat food, you need to pee. It’s  unchanging. 

DOG 

Food? Yes, I love food! Is there food? 

(DOG walks over to the empty dog bowl and sniffs it.) 

DOG 

There is no food. 

CAT 

You already ate it. 

DOG 

Did I? Well, I would like to eat again. Do you have food? 

CAT 

Of course, I have food. 

DOG 

May I have it? 

CAT 

No. 

DOG 

No? But I’m hungry, Gigi, and you have food.

CAT 

It’s not that I don’t want to give you the food. It’s just that you cannot pos­si­bly  have the food. See? It’s perched on that shelf up there. You cannot reach it. 

(DOG slumps to the ground and scratch­es irri­ta­bly at a collar around his neck.) 

DOG 

You are right. I cannot reach your food. I wonder if I have any food? (DOG goes over and sniffs the empty food bowl.) 

DOG 

No food. Now I am hungry, and I need to pee. 

CAT 

Astral, if you need to pee, why don’t you go outside? 

DOG 

How can I go outside? Owner is not here to take me outside. 

CAT 

The door is open. See? It is slight­ly cracked. You only need to nudge it with  your snout, and it will open. 

(DOG jumps up excitedly.) 

DOG 

I can go outside? 

CAT 

Yes, we both can leave, I suppose. 

(DOG goes over to the door and eyes it cautiously.) 

DOG 

But if I leave, Owner could return, and I would miss him. 

CAT 

Yes, that is true. If we do not know when he will return, we do not know if we  can leave without missing him.

DOG 

I don’t want to miss him. 

CAT 

If you leave, you may miss him. 

DOG 

So do we con­tin­ue waiting? 

CAT 

I suppose it is our only option. 

DOG 

I still need to pee. 

CAT 

You could pee on the houseplant. 

DOG 

This plant? Why, it is barely alive. 

(DOG sniffs the house plant sitting next to the couch.) 

CAT 

That is prob­a­bly because you have peed on it before. 

DOG 

Me? I’ve peed on this plant? 

CAT 

Many times. 

DOG 

This plant is dying because I pee on it. 

CAT 

But you must pee, and so the plant suffers. You cannot help it. 

DOG 

But I do not want to hurt the plant.

CAT 

We all hurt the plant some­time or another. It is inescapable. I must sharpen  my claws because I am a CAT. (Stretch­es arm out and flexes claws.) And so I  sharpen my claws on the plant. See the large scrapes along its stalk? It hurts  the plant. It cannot be helped. And so the plant will die. 

DOG 

Well, I am not ready to hurt the plant. I will pee later. 

(DOG goes over to the empty food bowl. Sniffs it.) 

DOG 

There is no food to eat. 

CAT 

Astral, maybe there is food to eat outside. I hear birds. Birds are delicious. 

DOG 

I can’t go outside. I have never gone outside without Owner. 

CAT 

If you do not go outside and if I do not go outside, we will not eat. The birds  will live. (CAT sighs sadly.) 

(DOG cocks his head and runs to the window.) 

DOG 

He is coming! I see him! I knew he would return! Oh, I have missed Owner. 

(DOG jumps at the win­dowsill. CAT looks out through the window from her perch.) 

CAT 

No, Astral, that is not him. I have seen that man before. 

(Mailman walks up to the door. DOG barks aggres­sive­ly at him through the  window.) 

MAILMAN 

Whoa there feller, no need to bark. You see me every day.

(DOG looks up at CAT.) 

DOG 

I do? 

CAT 

I suppose you do. 

MAILMAN 

It’s okay, Gilbert will be home soon. He’ll take care of you. 

(DOG stops barking and looks up at CAT ques­tion­ing­ly. Mailman sorts the mail  in his hand then looks up.) 

MAILMAN 

Why, the door is open. What a good boy for not escaping. 

(Mailman puts mail into the mail slot. It falls onto a heap of unopened mail on  the floor.) 

MAILMAN 

Bye now, good boy. Don’t worry, Gilbert will be back soon. 

(DOG and CAT watch as the man walks away from the house.) 

DOG 

That man knows me and knows Owner. 

CAT 

And it looks like he comes often. 

(CAT ges­tures towards the pile of unopened mail on the floor.) 

DOG 

Am I a good boy for not leaving? What if Owner wants me to leave? Is Owner  testing me by leaving the door open? It is so hard to know what to do without  Owner here. 

(CAT sits up, looks at DOG.) 

CAT 

I am not sure. 

(DOG looks sadly out the window. Scratch­es at his collar.) 

DOG 

It is all so much easier with Owner here. Oh, Gigi, it’s all too much. (DOG  sighs.) I need to take a nap. Perhaps when I wake up, Owner will be here. 

CAT 

Yes, perhaps. 

(DOG circles three times and lays on the floor.) 

CAT 

Astral, why must you do that? 

DOG 

Do what? 

CAT 

Circle three times before you lay down. What does it do? What is the  purpose? 

(DOG looks con­fused. CAT licks her paws while lis­ten­ing to DOG.) 

DOG 

It is what I always do. If I want to sleep, I must circle. Why do you lick your paws? 

(CAT stops licking her paws. DOG falls asleep. CAT watches DOG sleep for a  moment. CAT also circles three times and lies down.) 

(Time passes.) 

(DOG wakes up barking. Wakes up CAT. DOG quickly looks around and stops  barking.) 

DOG 

I had a dream, Gigi.

CAT 

Yes, obvi­ous­ly. 

DOG 

Owner and I were playing in the park. He would throw the ball, and I would  run and fetch it for him. Over and over. I was so happy. And I was peeing  every­where! And now, I am back here. And you are still here as well. 

CAT 

Yes, we are here togeth­er, Astral. You did not actu­al­ly go any­where. (DOG gets up slowly and looks outside the window.) 

DOG 

And Owner has not arrived? 

CAT 

No. He may not come today. 

DOG 

I wonder if he has ever come. 

(DOG walks over and absent­ly sniffs the empty dog bowl. He walks back to the  middle of the floor, circles three times, and lies down. Scratch­es irri­ta­bly at his  collar.) 

DOG 

And what is this on my neck? It bothers me. 

(DOG scratch­es irri­ta­bly again at his collar.) 

CAT 

Owner put it on you. You used to like it. You said it remind­ed you of Owner. 

DOG 

A gift from Owner? So he does exist. 

(DOG con­tin­ues to anx­ious­ly scratch at the collar.)

DOG 

A nice gift, but I believe it is suf­fo­cat­ing me. 

CAT 

I never said it was a gift, Astral. 

(DOG con­tin­ues to scratch at the collar. He rubs his head and his body against  the floor, trying to get the collar off. He becomes more and more anxious.) 

DOG 

I cannot get it off. Will I die then? 

CAT 

No, you have always worn the collar, and you have never died. 

DOG 

And so what do I do? 

CAT 

You get used to it. You accept it. Maybe you can even begin to like it again. It  is from him, after all. 

DOG 

It is suf­fo­cat­ing. But also … you said it was from him? 

CAT 

Yes, it was the very first thing he ever gave you. 

DOG 

Well, then I have no choice but to wear it. It is just so heavy. (DOG’s head slumps down.) 

CAT 

A burden you must bear for your owner. 

DOG 

I wish he would arrive soon. I am very hungry.

CAT 

I think he may not come today. Perhaps we should go outside? We could go  together. 

DOG 

Today? Right now? But what if Owner comes while we are away? 

CAT 

Then we wait 

DOG 

I need him to come. 

CAT 

Yes, I know you do. He will come tonight … or tomor­row. If he does not  come, then we will go outside tomorrow. 

DOG 

Yes, tomor­row. 

(DOG tugs at his collar.)

This story orig­i­nal­ly appeared in Stonecoast Review Issue 20. Support local book­sellers and inde­pen­dent pub­lish­ers by order­ing a print copy of the mag­a­zine.

Photo by Tatiana Rodriguez